Public Stoning. Step right up!

That's right folks, line right up and throw stones at the hypocrite. Get a good one. Wind up good. Aim for the face. I deserve it. I feel like the Houston Oilers blowing the 42 point lead vs. the Bills in that playoff game years ago.

I am playing in only my second $20 180 player tournament (well, I am a wannabe)ever. This was a big step up for me, but I am taking to heart DoubleAs mantra of playing the higher levels to get better. And get better I did.

I was below average most of the way, as I am a tighter player. At one point my Q dropped below .5 and I thought I was done. But chip and a chair. I NEVER give up. I fought back to below average. Then, just before the break, I get a nice run of bad callers for ALL their chips.

I have TP, get called by Mid-pair. I get and overpair, get called by TP. Then, inexplicably, I get called by Kd5d when I go all in from the BB with TT. The flop has a T, the turn the fourth diamond, and then the river gives him the flush… and me the boat. (I thought I had lost the hand!) Then, I break a FOURTH player when my AJ hits TP on the flop and he CALLS my big bet with nothing but an Ace.

At break #2 I am the chip leader. (I made the swing from .5 to chip leader in 10 minutes.) There are 25 left and 18 places pay. I can’t possible blow this, can I? Warning: NO BAD BEAT STORY COMING. But this is going to be painful. Today’s word? “eviscerate”.

Level IX (300/600) – 22 left, 18 spots paid – AVG stack = 11k
Seat #6 is the button
Seat 1: (7609 in chips)
Seat 4: (24092 in chips)
Seat 5: (14835 in chips)
Seat 6: (28953 in chips) < the new chip leader going into the hand.
Seat 7: (8052 in chips) < this guy had me covered when he gave me 80% of his chips earlier with the K5s call PRE-FLOP.
Seat 8: Columbo777 (17886 in chips) < about 4th in chips overall.
Seat 9: (10547 in chips)
ante 50
SB: posts small blind 300
Columbo777: posts big blind 600 < a pittance

*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Columbo777 [Ad Ks] < but out of position.
folds
folds
MP: calls 600
folds
LP: raises 1800 to 2400 < premium hand or theif?
folds
Columbo777: calls 1800 < why not just fold? HE IS THE CHIP LEADER. Mistake #1 (the only debatable one) Make the money first, then go for the win.
MP folds

Ok, the pot is 4800. Still manageable

*** FLOP *** [Ah 5c 2s]
I have flopped TP, but don’t want to get into a big battle with the chip leader. I can fold my way to the money.
Columbo777: bets 1800 < I expect this to make the point that I have an Ace and I want to see what he has. MISTAKE #2, the weak lead bet.
LP: calls 1800 < He says, “that was a weak bet. My Ace has a better kicker, or my big pair is still good."


*** TURN *** [Ah 5c 2s] [Qs]
Columbo777: bets 1800 < another weak bet.
LP: raises 1800 to 3600 < He is telling me he is not going away.
Columbo777: calls 1800 < I think he has AQ and I am beat. Yet I call. MISTAKE #3

*** RIVER *** [Ah 5c 2s Qs] [2c]
Columbo777: checks
LP: bets 21103 and is all-in
Columbo calls time.
Columbo777: calls 10036 and is all-in < WTF?! Are you kidding me? MISTAKE #4 AND MISTAKE #5. I think I am beat and still call, PLUS I 10k is still enough to make the money!! I somehow get emotionally attached to my lost sheep and jump off the cliff to be with them in the valley. Ho Ho Ho, stupid giant.

*** SHOW DOWN ***
LP: shows [Qd Qh] (a full house, Queens full of Deuces)-or AQ, what's the dif?
Columbo777: shows [Ad Ks] (two pair, Aces and Deuces)
LP collected 36922 from pot


This is the worst set of decisions I have EVER made and it cost me EV, pride, and a probable payoff of >$40.

Let’s lay it out there so we never, ever do anything this stupid again.

1. WHY tangle with the chip leader on the bubble? To defend your BB? I am not even a defender type!!!
2. Why play AK out of position on the bubble against the only player who can bust you? It's a drawing had for jimminy-sake.
3. I let a recent run of good cards give me artificial confidence. I HAVE MADE THIS MISTAKE BEFORE. I hate that. You build up chips gambling and you know to change gears, but then you dont.
4. IF you decide to play the hand, how can you NOT protect it post flop?! Insanely bad! You can’t play TP weak. And I did. I played scared and let a player draw a cheap turn card*.
5. HOW do you not make the river fold? I lost 60% of my chips, but I still would have had a Q of .9!!! Hardly out of the money!! That was a STRATEGIC mistake. And that is the worst type of mistake. I pride myself on strategy over tactics and this was the worst type of digression.

*Yes, he did hit his 2 outer to beat me. And the board had no real draws. Most of the time, I am going to win this hand and this mistake would be a forgotten footnote as he pays off my Ace with his big pocket pair. I fool him into thinking I don’t have the Ace by my weak flop bet and he comes out with both barrels blazing on the turn. The only flaw in the plan is if he hits his 2-outer set on the turn. Yeah, right. Good luck. But that is going to happen and it did not need to. I could have pushed him out post flop. I KNEW I had to be ahead against everything accept 55 or A5. He could have made that big pre-flop raise on a steal and I let that thought steer me into playing scared. If you are going to play scared, DON’T PLAY. FOLD. STOOPID STOOPID STOOPID (hitting head with shoe).

Would this hand have been such a fatal set of mistakes had we not been at the bubble? Nope. In any case BUT the bubble vs. the big stack, I feel this play was ok. Even justified as you are dragging down a QQ by making him bet off his stack vs. the TP drawing to 2 outs. But in this STRATEGIC position, you can’t play TACTICAL. And I did. And that makes me the hypocrite.

So spit on that stone, cock that arm back, and - “OUCH!” Wait for it!!!!
And let me have it. It’s the only way I am going to remember.

If you see me this weekend, and I am wearing my Columbo shirt (so you’ll know me), instead of shaking my hand before the tournament and wishing me luck, slap me in the head so I don’t forget any of this. It’s the nicest thing you can do for me. Really. (and it certainly will confuse the wife.)

Oh yeah, Mrs. Columbo cashed 2 for 2 last night.